Ask Chris Hart: My man is amazing, but I am confused about my feelings for him

I met this amazing guy at a work training and although we work in the same office though different departments, we decided to give dating a try. When I say he is amazing, he really is. He opens up the door for me, will take me out randomly, wants to be part of my family and friends, introduces me to his friends as his girl,will wait for me do to my hair so that he drops me see..amazing. But I don’t like him as much as he likes me. He is everything I ever wanted in a guy but my feelings are just not that strong for him as his are as strong for me. I want to still be in the relationship because I’m scared I won’t find anyone else as good to me as him. Honestly, the work issue wouldn’t be a bother if my feelings were strong. Please help. What should I do?


Chris says:


It’s surprising how often this happens. Your date is so good to you – and yet you don’t feel good about them in return. These are feelings you shouldn’t ignore! It means that your subconscious has spotted something that may ultimately wreck the relationship, but that you’re not conscious of. Maybe some personality issues. Maybe some flaky behaviour you’re overlooking? Maybe some physical incompatibility, that means your love life together will never hit the heights? Whatever it is, it’s usually our subconscious that spots it first…

…so just take your time. Maybe the cause of these feelings will become clear. Or whatever it is fades away. Or maybe it’s actually you – like you’re just not ready. But whatever it is, don’t get too committed until your mind is clear. And be prepared to let him go if your love for him doesn’t grow.

All the best,


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